Thursday, December 31, 2009

Happy New Year

As the first rays of the sun touched me this morning
I realized its the last day of 2009
Cannot stop the time it is running
I have left another year behind

Tomorrow will be a first day
A new chapter in life
I'll be leading my own way
And many pages to write

I don't have a control over time
I'll have to paint it with the colors that I have
Sometimes it will be bright and happening
And sometimes it will be sad

I welcome you Oh!! 2010
I know you'll have different plans
I pray to you to hold me tight
So that I'll remain what I am.

Sorrow , pain, happiness and Joy
Are said to be part of life
The thing that matters the most is
Amidst these how you SURVIVE

I wish you'll a Happy New Year
Full of happiness and without fear
Live your life the way you want
Be happy and that's what counts..(Sagarmani)

Monday, December 28, 2009

New Year---Searching Eternity

I look back to see when I started this year
Happy I was there was no single fear
Dream were being polished..but fulfilled.? No
Now I ask myself, where am I supposed to go?

Chasing my dusted dreams
There is no one to listen even when I scream
How long will I pat myself saying its Okay?
How long will my fake satisfaction portray?

My achievements which I have never touched
My cheerfulness which is withering away
My secret dreams untouched
How will I survive in the coming days?

Am I born to be a common man?
Sacrificing petty things in life
Am I supposed to live like this
Celebrating new years without light.

Darkness is has darkened the dreams
Streams has Ocean but I have not even seen
A single glimpse of where I'll be..
Searching in the endless eternity.(Sagarmani)

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

I am a Terrorist

I have slaughtered my conscience
Stabbed my feelings
Strangled my desires and emotions
Hung my imagination
Butchered my compassion
Killed my mercy
Murdered my sympathy
Crushed my love
Decimated my kindness
Defeated my desires
Destroyed my dream
Exterminated my affection
Tortured my sweetness
Mutilated my tenderness
Slayed my thoughtfulness
Vanquished my heart
Massacred my brain
And I am here drinking blood...
Blood of the fellow humans,
Humans!!! They call me terrorist(Sagarmani)

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Drunken Destiny

Sometimes it is hazy
Sometimes it is dark
Sometimes it is dusky
Sometimes as clear as spark.

I am low when its hazy
Sad when its dark
Moody when its dusky
And active when there is a spark

Clear yet confused
Darkened with hope
Hanging with desires
No rope to support

I move along with my drunken destiny
Hallucinated and high
I live with my drunken destiny
In illusion I sigh.(Sagarmani)

Friday, December 11, 2009

My destiny is detained(Appraisals)

I have many dreams
I have many promises to fulfill
I have liabilities to exhaust
There is a huge castle in the air I have built.

My mom wants a diamond ring
Dad wants a share from my side for a plot
I want to invest some cash somewhere
I need to save, to marry my love.

My brother wants to go out for a holiday
He wants a pair of Reebok shoes
I also want a pair of specs for myself
I need to clear all my dues.

My hope has been cello-taped inside a brown paper
I may add a brick to the castle or do even better
I may even have to lie to my mom
Saying, wait until few more months.

My dreams are shut inside a brown envelope
I can just pray to God with lots of hope
Or I'll have to wear my old shoes that are torn
To save the money to fill up my examination forms.

My plans are detained inside a brown paper
I may initiate them or have to arrange for dates later
My destiny and fate is locked with a tape
I may smile or frown until then I'll have to wait.(Sagarmani)

Mother's Cry

She was howling and crying in pain
Holding her baby she was running in the rain.
No food, no shelter, she wanted to feed her hungry baby.
She was pleading for help but no one was ready.

She had rashes on her body.
She didn't bother the bleeding wound
She wanted to save her child
Who was gonna die very soon.

She didn't know if it was a fever
Neither she knew it could be flu
Helpless she was as she was never
She didn't know what to do.?

Cursing herself on top of her lungs she roared
She was saying
“God, please don't make anyone a mother,
If you have destined her to be poor.”

She could only sigh and look at the sky
Praying to god not to let her baby die.
Helpless mother, with all the love she had
Lay flat one the street with the baby on her lap.(Sagarmani)

Masking Death(Swine Flu Effects)

How long will you fight with nature?
How long will you hold your breath?
How long will you run away?
Run away Masking death.

You were warned plenty of times
You turned your deaf ears to it
You saw the green turning into yellow
But you always ignored to see it.

You saw the ponds filled with dirt
You passed by but never felt hurt
You saw people dying and crying in pain
It didn't matter to you, as you were not in pain.

How long will you ruin the mother earth?
How long?, you've be doing it since your birth.
How long? Stop it!! Our mother is wretched.
How long will you run away Masking death.??(Sagarmani)

Malsej....away from worries

Looking out of the bus
The serene weather and the cool breeze
hitting my cheeks
It was green everywhere
And the clouds dancing in their own rhythm
Flirting with the mountains drenched and wet.

The Golden rays trying to get a glimpse
Of the beautiful earth
Jealous and Envying the
Beautiful white waterfalls
Flowing finding their own way
Free and happy
To be a part of the mother earth
Like us splashing water on each other..

Free from worries, tension, work and pressures
Away from everything
Enjoying the every bit of little time
The life gifted to us.(Sagarmani)

Log off

I could feel the movement of breath
A sheer silence had fallen
The click of mouse and the keyboard keys
Roaring to my ears at sudden

I could hear a ring
Calling for someone in the corner
Some whispers flying through the wind
Personal message to deliver

I could hear the steel crying
Somebody might have dropped it hard
I could hear the printer running
and the beep of swiping cards

I could hear an ill throat cough
giggles in the washroom and sudden rush
I could make out the drawers shut
key chains singing when safely tucked

I closed my eyes for brain to rest
to gather the strength as it is stressed
The day was hectic and it was tough
Now its time to finally “Log off”(Sagarmani)

I have no choice but to cry.

Tender age with tender brain and imagination
I was given a choice by a complete stranger
Probably a friend to my father
The first question ever asked which I actually recall..

Who do you love the most, Mom or Dad?
I used to literally get confused
I knew I could have said “both”
The birth of a diplomat
But I said Dad as Mom was not there somewhere near.

Only to please him
Or maybe I liked the way he used to lift me in the air
And kiss me..saying I love you too
Same, I did when mom was around
And similar questions were thrown to me.
I was diplomat at the tender age
when they were together
I knew “Both” was an apt word

Grown up today, to realize
I love them equally
When no questions thrown on me
Far away..realizing
How much we love each other

But time..there is no time
I can hear them, see their pictures
Only to shed few tears
The expression of love
I know people say..Men don't cry
But I I have no choice...(sagarmani)

I blew up 28 candles tonight

I blew up 28 candles tonight
Coffined my past into memories
Some good some bad
Some wrong and some right.
The oldest thing I remember..
I was running away not to go to school..
My Mom chasing me..
She didn't want me to be a fool..
Ups and downs Sun and rains
Joy and sorrows Happiness and pain.
Today I am jotting down things
Tomorrow this will be a past..
Welcoming death and farewell to past..
Everything to perish nothing to last..
Nobody wish to die..
But no one can hold their breath that long
I celebrate as I have lived for 28 years
Tomorrow can be go where I belong
I blew up 28 candles tonight..
I may or may not the next year who knows..
I don't know if I am wrong or right
28 years will not come... they are blown

I am the Mother(How it feels-the loss of a son)

My dreams are shattered
I have lost the last hope to live
My lad died in the battlefield
Saving the boundaries, do you believe

I am forced to be a proud mother
Salute, flag and the gunshots in the air
But, does anyone realizes in real
Of a pain that mothers feel

I had nurtured him for nine months in the womb
I was the first one to hear him cry
I was the first person to whom he smiled
I was the one who made his nappies dry

He held my finger and learned to walk
Mama was the first word he learned to talk
I fed him blood from my breast
I rose up whole night to see him sleep

He used to cry when I left him alone
Following me where ever I go
I used to buy him chocolates and sweets
Still he pulled to ask for some more

I sent him to school and groomed him to best
I saved him from papa when he was depressed
I used to hide his faults and flaws
I love him more than anything in the world

He completed his studies he went for job
As an army man I couldn't stop
He sent me Sarees and bangles to wear
He wrote me letters with love and care

I was so happy, I had seen a girl for him
Beautiful, Sober and classy as queen
He had asked me to send a photograph
and I had quickly posted it to him

He had said its a surprise if he liked her or not
And here is a telegram saying he has been shot

I am a mother don't console me with awards
My son is dead I don't want a reward
I have grown old, I have turned Grey
God, call me up is what I pray(Sagarmani)

I am not a friend

I am not a part of any conversation
I am not the one to whom people share
I've no right to make fun of anyone
I have no one to love and care

I am only there to greet a smile
A brief talk standing for a while
I am just the next one who shares few puff
I am not a buddy for the time that's rough

I am just the next person
Whom you want to but can't avoid
My shoulders aren't for somebody to lean
Of tears my eyes are devoid

I am not the one who is hugged
In the times of pain and joy
I am not the one who is involved
at the times when all enjoy

I am not a friend a medium to wipe
when tears in the eyes falls
I am a common guy in the crowd
Who nobody likes to call.

I am not a friend
I am not a friend(Sagarmani)

Human Nature( A Hard truth)

I was the one who cried yesterday
I couldn't see my friends weep
I couldn't eat properly, couldn't see them go
I couldn't even sleep

But today I am grinning and smiling
Only to know I am safe
This a human nature, born to be
Can't even hide the selfish face.

Attachment, love, friends exists
Though, they are better than the ghost
But when, the question is about my own survival,
Its me who I love the most.(Sagarmani)

Encounter with Ghost

I worked till late in the office that night
Had to go home & had to catch a flight
It was almost one in the morning
I was exhausted and I was yawning.

I drove of my vehicle, the roads were empty
Listening to old songs, I was driving at ninety
The city had slept, only few vehicles were moving
I could figure out some stray dogs roaming

The silence was sheer as I looked out the mirror
A vehicle swooped & crossed me, had to decrease my gear
I suddenly stopped as there was a loaded truck ahead
Somebody knocked the pane I saw an old lady beg

I ignored her sight thought it was middle of night
People still begging this is the heights
I stormed on the empty road like a flying jet
Was thinking to myself I must not get late

I regained the pace, I could hear the windy sound
There was silence everywhere except some horn beeping around
I was enjoying the music, it was an old Denver song
I was following the same and was singing along

It happened to be I turned to my right
I was so shocked I couldn't believe my eyes
The lady I saw was still knocking the window pane
Begging at my speed I had gone insane

Next thing I remember I hit a roadside shed
I hurt my shoulder and I hurt my head
I woke up next morning I was all blood shed
Laying flat helpless in a hospital bed.(Sagarmani)

Going Away(fearing layoff)

I can't cry out loud
I can't even shed my tears
My brothers and sisters are going away
Leaving behind heart filled with fear.

We have shared joy and fun
We were together in the long run
But there is a huge cliff ahead
We can't move together but to spread

I have been holding my breath for long
Analyzing things and what went wrong
A while ago we were flying on the top of the world
Now, without wings, we are like a poor bird.

I can only pray to God, if you are really there
Help us all and take us out of this fear
I want to sleep, in happiness I want to scream
When I wake up in the morning please make it a dream.(sagarmani)

Far away from race....

Rolling and Dribbling
My life has lost its pace
I was amongst the one who ran
But now I am out of the race

I have had the glimpse of the end
The start was fabulous as far as I know
But, now I am right in the middle
Lost my path, I don't know where to go.

There were ups there were downs
There were obstacles very high
I utilized everything in me to overcome them
I didn't even let myself sigh

But now, I see nothing ahead
The path is easy but enthusiasm is dead
I don't know if I am lazy or I am bored
My desires are dormant, my emotions tore

I just want to diffuse myself
In the never ending space
Far away from everyone who run
Far away from every race.(sagarmani)

Ghostly Ride (Real Story)

He was a young lad
Speed was his passion
He owned Plenty of Cars
He used to attend his college
And run a Restro-Bar

He used to work late night
Usually closed the office at one
He used to drive with speed to home
On the streets there used to be no one.

It was one day he left at one
Had to pick up his mom from relatives home
He was alone and in speed, the roads were empty
It was dark and the speedometer rose to 120

It was a rough road secluded and pitch dark
A village near the town he couldn't see a single spark
He was in speed and saw some lady ask for lift
He had to ignore as he was in great speed.

Suddenly, he felt the lady might be in pain
He slowed the down the car and moved the reverse way
He could see from the rear, the lady was standing far behind
As he reached the place, he could find no one.

He was shocked and started to move ahead
The lady was standing where he had stopped at the first place
He dare to stop and asked the lady to get in
He turned on the music and started questioning.

Lady responded to few and was silent many times
He was speeding too as he had to reach on time.
He saw ahead he had to take an acute right turn.
Just to find the lady sitting next to him was gone

He was scared to heights he suddenly rose his speed
To be in the safe place as fast as he could reach
He was heading with the speed he never drove before
He saw the same lady waving hand near the drivers window.(Sagarmani)

Post Lunch Effects

I have stuffed myself with chicken and curry
And its high time that I need to worry
My eyes are drooping, I cant stop to yawn
But, I'll have to be here till the day turns to dawn

How I wish I was there in my bed
I would lie down as if I was dead
I would snore all the fats out
Until the chicken would come out and shout.

On top of that that today is Friday
Thank God at least it is not a dry day
The words are dancing the numbers and letters
I need to work have no plans better..

I am sitting here finding words to rhyme
Telling the story about post lunch time..
The clock seems slow somebody please check the cells
How I wish I was in school and rung a recess bell

I would be the first one to rush out of the door
Forget all my homework and the daily chores
My dad would force me to sit down to study
But, I would sleep off and care for nobody.(Sagarmani)

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Saluting India!!

My Salutation!! Oh Mother!
I am proud to be your son
I promise I'll stand by you always
If all your children run.

You are crowned by The Himalayas
Your feet washed by the ocean
You heart is filled with golds and diamonds
Towards glory its always driven

I know you have been hit by bullets
You've been bombarded with bombs
I stand here to protect you mother
I will not spare the last breath earned.

Its you who have given the identity mother
Its you who have given us the name
I will sacrifice the last drop of blood left
But will never let you feel ashamed.

Oh! mother today I promise on behalf of one and all.
We will never let your glory fall
We will try our best to give whatever we can
Divided we will fall but united we will stand.


I am an unknown man
In this unknown world
In an unknown city
With Unknown destiny

With an unknown future
Unknown is my dream
The reasons are unknown
Unknown why I scream

My actions are unknown
Unknown are my deeds
The path is unknown
Unknown where to proceed

I am unknown to my neighbors
To colleagues I am unknown
I am unknown to my friends
unknown. if I really exist.

Unknown are my feelings
My cries are unknown
Unknown are my emotions
My smile is unknown

Unknown is my imagination
My dedication unknown
Unknown is my existence
To myself I am Unknown..(Sagarmani)

Going home

Amidst the snowy white mountains and the green hills
Lies my home where the love is filled..
I'll see my parents and the kids at play
After an year, I was praying for this day.

I called up my mom, she cried that I was coming
I know..the food I like she will be cooking.
My dad was happy too, he was counting the days
Waiting until I reach, to hug him and Lay..

On his lap as he will caress my hair
I'll see my mom from very near..
The kids will come as ask for their gifts..
Oh I am waiting for the day..I reach..

The heaven..where white stream flows..
If I am lucky I may feel the snow..
The aroma of the kitchen..I have not been eating here
My mom is cooking for me with love and care..

My childhood mates will rush to me.
They'll talk all nonsense and also ask me
If I have a girl..or am I going to marry..
It will be fun..they'll arrange for a party..

I'll not even realize how the days will go.
Time will run faster but the movements slow..
Again I'll be away..away from home..
Thousands of miles living all alone..(Sagarmani)


I am a creamy white tile
I have been hit all while
I have got bruises on my head but now it hardly feels
I have been constantly hit by the cruel high heels

You can hear the knock knock knock
With many sounds, specially the “TAK TAK TAK”
Nobody is at the door, Its not as you feel
Its the sound that echoes, the sound of the heel.

The Low Heel TAPS and the Flat heel drags
The Chunky heel slaps and the High Heel rags
The Kitten Heel scratch and the Stiletto Cracks
The Plateau heel seems sober but the Block heel is mad

Spool heel and the Pencil heel they poke very hard
If one of you would bear it I would give you a reward
The wedge heel is still bearable the Cone heel horribly slaps
If you hear a KNOCK KNOCK somewhere don't dare take a nap.

I am a tile I can bear it I am spread all over
The Heels are dangerous never think them to be sober
They tap, they slap, they will knock your eardrums off
You can use cotton, if you want to make them little soft.(Sagarmani)

Habituating Myself

I am habituating myself to live in sorrow.
Today is over but what would happen tomorrow.
Question of my fate knocks my future door
I just keep numb, I have no voice to roar.

I am habituating myself to live in minimal
Unwillingly, it was never my principle
The joy of luxury can ruin my basic goal
Others will be far ahead and I'll be left alone

I am habituating myself not to cry.
I may have to cry for worst and tears may dry.
The tears may take away the only smile
Sadness and pain torturing all while

I am habituating myself to analyze my way
Before there is darkness and I am left to sway
From here to nowhere or where ever it be
Trying to find my own identity.(Sagarmani)

Erased Soul

Bitter and painful why does it hurt so hard?
I had been trying to smile since long but the heart is torn apart.
Better I would feel had the tears flown all day long
But it is stuck somewhere in the throat, cant scream can't run

Aloofness is all I feel in the crowd
I was not like this and people were proud.
The sleeplessness has sublimed there are no stars to count
I am gazing in the dark listening to the silent sound

Thoughts and imagination have all dried
My feelings turned dormant I fear if they die
I howl at myself cant console the freaky pain..
Sun ain't sunny anymore, I don't enjoy the rains.

Am I playing with my own destiny?.
Am I trying to hide myself away?..
Why everything is so stagnant even thoughts and Imagination..?
Am I erasing my soul away?(Sagarmani)

Painting Pain

The silence prevails all over..
The sun seems to have eclipsed
I was smiling a little while ago
But now I cant even believe.

My faith, my dreams, my desires
Has lost all its grip
My life was a beautiful page a while ago
To a blank page it has been flipped.

I had drawn my happiness.
I had a dream I'll have a beautiful spouse.
I had painted my joy all over
Grinning, would live in a lovely house.

The fear has overpowered now.
The heartbeat has lost its speed
My muscles seems cramped, vision hazy
My whole body seems to be weak.

The page I had painted is washed away.
By a sudden unexpected rain
I am again left with a blank page
What, I can paint is PAIN.(sagarmani)

Why loneliness does not leave me alone?

Why loneliness does not leave me alone?
To tears and to pain I am prone
I tend to laugh but I am forced to hide my smile.
Why is sadness prevailing all while.?

I've forgotten everything I can..
But why the memories still scan
My brain..? I sometimes feel I deserve to grin
But why are hearts so hard to win?

Why everyone seem to be so selfish?
Indifferent they not even fear God..
Why aren't people bothered to wipe a tear
Or compassionate enough to give a hug?

When everything runs away from me
And I've no where to run
There is only aloofness and loneliness
Alone as my companions.(Sagarmani)

Monday, December 7, 2009

Adventures of Jolly – “Adventuring Hunger”

Jolly ran for his life. A stone nearly hit his head. He had no option but to run. It was raining outside and deserted. It was quite warm in there and the food was tasty too. But to his ill-fate, somebody saw him barking to a small kid. Jolly was inside the bin. Jolly knew he was cursed by his friends as he had secretly planned this trip to Mr. Patil's wedding.

He was a little puppy when a rag picker's son had named him Jolly. Then, all children used to run after him, hold him, feed him. (In those blissful days, the children played with him, shower him with love and fed him much more than his tiny tummy could hold.) He used to get a share of meal from the rag picker family and an old rug to lie down. He never missed to bark at any sound that would come up near the house. But, as he grew young and strong, his appetite increased and he ate as much as the rag picker . Rag picker's son was very fond of Jolly. The reason given by the mother was that she gets disturbed while sleeping by Jolly's barks. One day the father, forcibly pushed Jolly inside a jute sack and threw him to the carrier of a moving truck. Since then, Jolly's had faced many ups and downs in life.

Mr. Patil's wedding was not a surprise to Jolly. He had been observing the crowd at Mr. Patil's house for many days. Jolly visited the waste bin near Mr. Patil's house once a day. His friends avoided venturing into that bin because Mr. Patil was very particular about the waste management. He hardly threw any food in the bin. Jolly was in love with the bin because once a week he got to eat chicken. Mr. Patil's family was a vegetarian family. Every Wednesday Mr. Patil secretly ordered a whole tandoori to gobble up hurriedly and throw half of it to the bin, so that nobody comes to know about it. Jolly had not revealed this secret to anyone. Since, ten days Jolly has been eating a lot. His friends were pretty upset with him because he avoided going out to the dustbin hunt in the middle of the night.

Jolly was pretty upset that day as he couldn't enjoy the delicacy. Even though his tummy was almost full his mouth was still watery. He didn't dare to go back as he feared the stones. One hit and he'll fall ill for many days. Jolly decided to wait in the front gate until the wedding got over. The guest started moving out, one by one. It was a huge crowd. Mr. and Mrs. Patil also drove off along with their family. The house seemed to be empty. Only people to be heard were caterers and the pandal contractors. Jolly decided to move in but to his shock he couldn't find any food. The waste bin was loaded on a truck. Jolly couldn't do anything but see as the truck moved out of the gate.

Jolly ran with all his energy to see if he could find his friends so that they can chase the truck and figure out where the food would get dumped. Jolly ran faster than the truck and checked all the waste bins in the area but could not find anyone. He tried the last bin which was the common bedroom for all of them. There, he found all, sleeping, hungry. The bin was emptied by the Municipal guys in the morning. Jolly narrated the story to his friends. They were furious. Jolly apologized, he was genuinely felt guilty to see all his friends hungry. He lied down finding a space for himself in the corner.

BANG! There was a sudden sound. While all the others ran in fear, Jolly raised his head in alert to examine the situation. Every dog has his day and that was surely Jolly's. He saw a man pouring plenty of his desired garbage into the bin . Jolly ran and sat on the top of the bin smiling at his buffet. “Hey!”, he called his friends with pride, “The dinner is served.” While all the dogs began to eat, Jolly paused. Never had he seen the garbage being re-dumped into the bin. In astonishment he turned to looked at the man. The man hopped onto the drivers seat of a garbage truck and waved at Jolly.

The young boy who once gave him his name, gave him his dinner as well as pride today. The rag picker's son drove away.(Sagarmani)